Mara Wilson Shared How Michelle Trachtenberg Was "Misunderstood" As A Child Star In A Heartfelt Essay

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"So much of being a child actor is about making everyone happy."

She's known for her roles in '90s classics like Mrs. Doubtfire and 1996's Matilda.

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In a March 18 essay for Vulture, Mara remembered her friendship with the late actor Michelle Trachtenberg and the "bullying" she endured as a child actor.

michelle trachtenberg sitting on a sofa, wearing a sleeveless top, gazing at the camera

Michelle died on Feb. 26 at the age of 39.

michelle trachtenberg as adult

Like Mara, Michelle was a '90s child star in movies like Harriet the Spy and Inspector Gadget, the latter a role they had both auditioned for.

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Mara conversed with Michelle's child co-stars and friends in her essay, remembering that she and the Adventures of Pete & Pete star became fast friends as child actors while a few years apart.

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"Not only was she nice, I realized, but she was remarkably intelligent," Mara wrote. "Yet she managed not to be condescending and didn't try to impress with big words, the way other kids (including me) might have. She was smart, but she was also self-possessed, and didn't need to show off."

A young michelle smiles and gives a thumbs-up while wearing a long-sleeve outfit at a public event

"We had the kind of closeness that grows between girls who've spent a short but intense amount of time together, like summer-camp friends," she said. "After the press for Matilda and Harriet the Spy died down, though, we saw each other less and less, and I worried about when I'd see her again."

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Luckily, Michelle eventually moved to Burbank, and they became middle school classmates in Los Angeles.

Despite her popularity as a child star and her role in Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Michelle asked Mara in 1999, "Are the kids here mean to you?" Tears in her eyes, she said, "Because they are to me. They call me Harriet the Slut, Harriet the Bitch, Harriet the Bitchy Spy … and so much worse. They never stop."

Three people are sitting indoors on a sofa. The center person wears a shiny jacket, while the others wear casual tops. They appear relaxed

Mara recalled defending Michelle against accusations that she was a mean girl, saying, "She's not. I knew her. She's a sweetheart." She recognized that Michelle's presumed "meanness" might've been a defense against the bullying.

"It wasn't just that she was being bullied; it was that there wasn't any way she could get them not to hate her," Mara continued. "So much of being a child actor is about making everyone happy. It felt cruelly ironic to be so hated when our raison d’être was getting people to like us."

Young michelle with straight hair in a sleeveless top, smiling at the camera against a dark background

Mara explained when she started high school, she found herself "in the same place Michelle had been." She "was being bullied at school — both for having been a child actor and just for being an awkward teenager — and I felt completely isolated: The people-pleasing had made me resentful, and the resentment made me bitter and furious. Now everyone was calling me a bitch."

adult mara holding a relaxed cat close, both appearing content

Mara acknowledged that although they never had a chance to talk as adults, Michelle must have endured so much from "the cruel misogyny of the 2000s and the early 2010s" as she starred in more films and TV shows. "We never talked about it, but I know that if I did, she did too. I don’t know how she got through it," Mara said.

adult mara in a sleeveless red dress with dark hair poses confidently in front of a backdrop with partially visible gold lettering

An older Michelle starred in more movies like EuropTrip, Mysterious Skin, and the TV show Gossip Girl from 2008-2012.

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When Mara found out Michelle died, she recalled a sense of regret they drifted apart over the years, writing, "I always thought I would get the chance to see her again, to tell her how much I'd always looked up to her. To tell her the times we spent together as children were some of the best of my life."

michelle posing at an event in a sparkling gown with long sleeves and a belt, standing against a backdrop with logos

Read the full essay here.

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